


Forever is a Word that Cries

by actualtylerrjoseph (orphan_account)



Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Immortal! Josh Dun, M/M, Mentions of Death, Tyler becomes reincarnated as a cat, Tyler's dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-02
Updated: 2016-08-02
Packaged: 2018-07-28 22:40:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7659670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/actualtylerrjoseph
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Josh Dun is immortal. He doesn’t know why and he doesn’t know how, but he knows that he will never be happy again. Not after Tyler leaves.</p><p>Basically, Tyler dies in a car wreck and Josh is sad, until he sees a stray cat on the street</p><p>(Tyler dies before the story is written, so there isn't major death explicitly in the story but it is mentioned)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forever is a Word that Cries

Josh wakes up at 5:30 every morning. He’s been waking up that early for the past 74 years and he absolutely hates it. He wishes he could go back to when he had a reason to sleep late, and that reason was the sensation of someone else sleeping against him and the calm inhale, exhale against his neck. But that was 74 years ago, and now every time he wakes up at 5:30 he wakes up alone.

He makes his coffee black. It’s plain and bitter and 74 years ago he made two cups of coffee, and would add a cube of sugar to each. And he’d bring the cup over to the table and Tyler would smile and take a sip before leaning over the table to give him a coffee flavored kiss. Now, he stares at the empty seat across from him.

He plays the drums more than he used to. He plays them until his arms ache and his eyes are stinging with tears. He tells himself that he’s crying because his hands are bleeding, but he knows that if Tyler were there he’d be able to see right through him. On this particular day, after bandaging his hands up, he decides to go for a walk. He doesn’t know why; the weather is dreary and looks like it would rain, but he puts on his jacket and heads out anyway.

Josh regrets walking two miles away from his apartment when it starts to rain. His shoes were soaked and his jacket was drenched and Tyler loved the rain.

His eyes meet with another pair of soft browns and it’s like the rain stops falling. It’s a cat, and it’s staring right at Josh and Josh immediately feels bad for the poor thing. He carefully steps closer and kneels down next to it. He holds out his hand and the brown-eyed cat nestles against his fingertips.

“Hey, little guy,” he murmurs, stroking it’s damp fur. The cat’s eyes are shut and his tail flicks to the side. The cat, which purrs and rubs against his leg when he stands up, doesn’t have a collar; Josh scratches him behind his ears and the cat mews happily.

Josh doesn’t know why he takes the cat home, but he thinks it has something to do with the way he licks at his bandaged hands. He walks home with a warm feeling in his chest, but he decides it’s just the cat cradled in his jacket.

x

Josh is sitting at his kitchen table and the newly cleaned cat is sitting across from him, his paw reaching out to tap Josh’s hand each time his rests his hand on the table. Josh is debating between the names Holden Clawfield and Harry Pawter when the cat trots up to him and licks his nose. He smiles at the scratchy sensation and the cat meows back to him. He decides against naming the cat.

He moves and lies down on the small couch, the cat following and hopping onto his chest, breathing evenly and staring at Josh curiously.

“I bet your owner misses you,” Josh mumbles.

The cat mews, and Josh takes it as a reply of sorts.

“I’m probably crazy,” he hums, stroking the cat’s fur, “talking to you like you can understand me.”

Purrs fill the room, and Josh is pretty sure the cat understood him. Josh is pretty sure he's crazy

“You know, Tyler and I would just sit here and talk for hours..” he confesses, and goes off on a lazy story. By the time he stops talking, the cat is asleep on his stomach, and he laughs softly.

x

Josh doesn’t believe in much anymore. After all, he’s seen numerous people come and go in his life. When Tyler died, it only sealed the deal for him. He has dozens of books on reincarnation, and tries to give himself the benefit of the doubt, but each day that passes he loses hope. Tyler has been gone for 74 years, but he has yet to find him again. He’s staring at himself in the mirror and he has been for at least fifteen minutes now, and he’s waiting for Tyler to come in and tell him that he’s going to be late for work.

He hears a quiet mew from behind him and he turns, rubbing the sleep out of his face and smiling at the small cat at the doorway. It’s not Tyler, but he’s willing to take any comfort he can get right now.

“C’mon, let’s get you some breakfast, yeah?”

x

It’s not often that Josh wakes up in the middle of the night. But when he does, it’s because of Tyler and he usually doesn’t go back to sleep afterwards. It’s 2:37 in the morning and his vision is blurry and he furiously scrubs away his tears, his breathing erratic and his hands shaking. There’s a soft padding of feet on the empty wooden floors and Josh stills, his eyes casted down to his lap as he fists the sheets covering him.

“Tyler?” he pleads silently.

The only response he gets is a soft mew and the cat leaps onto his bed, leaning into his side and nestling him gently. He smiles sadly and scratches his behind his ears, waiting for his breathing to even out. They sit for an hour together, their breathing quiet, but at the same time very loud.

x

Cats live for fourteen years on average. Josh doesn’t know how long he’s had the cat, but he knows that it’s time is almost up. Humans live for a hundred years on average. That’s about 8 cat lives per human lifetime. But that doesn’t apply to Josh. He decides he’ll stick to cats anyway. Cats don’t complain about his messy lifestyle, or ask him about personal things. Instead they meow to be pet and fed and will curl up with him when he’s sad.

But the cat will leave him. Just like Tyler did.

He’s knows what’s going to happen soon. Everything leaves him eventually. Eventually. What a word that is.

Josh feels a familiar weight crawl onto his lap. The cat is slower, and can’t leap up to the couch like before, but it’s something. He scrubs a hand down his face and tells himself to be grateful for the small victories.

x

The cat dies on a Wednesday. It rains for the entire day. Josh doesn’t leave his house for a week. He drums for most of the week, until his hands are bleeding, and he keeps playing because he’s mad at himself and he’s mad at the cat for leaving and he’s mad at Tyler because how could he leave him like this.

He hits a sour note and he breaks his drumstick. He’s crying now, apologizing to no one because he could never be mad at Tyler. The cat is gone and there’s no one left for him to be mad at but himself.

Josh grabs another set of drumsticks and starts to play.

x

The air is colder now. Spring has long since passed, and Josh watches his neighbors put out Halloween decorations but he still feels empty. He still doesn’t go outside much, but he decides to change that. His feet are cold against his floor as he leaves his kitchen table to put on shoes. . He watches the cars drive by, it’s peaceful, and suddenly he feels very out of place. He closes the door and decides he’ll try walking again later.

x

Josh always goes on the same route when he walks. By the time he finishes the walk, he’s slightly numb, he forgot his jacket; he decides he’s okay with being numb and continues to walk. He acts like he doesn’t know where he’s going, but he knows.

x

Tyler didn’t want a big funeral when he died. But Tyler didn’t think he’d die when he was 28 years old, did he? Or maybe he did, Josh decides, and that’s why Tyler mentioned having a small funeral. He didn’t want to hurt anyone. He was always so caring of other people’s feelings. Josh believes that’s what he loved the most about Tyler. So when Josh heard the doctor’s voice telling say we couldn’t save him, he lost too much blood, I’m sorry, Josh started to plan a small funeral for him. It’s what he would have wanted.

It’s his birthday, and Josh always visits Tyler on his birthday. He kneels on the grass and puts flowers on the grave. His face is numb, he can’t tell if he’s crying or not but he’s pretty sure he is.

Josh wishes it would’ve been him that got hit by that car.

He hears a soft mew and looks over to see a cat next to him, and it’s like he gets it. Josh knows he’s crying now, and he carefully lifts up the cat to meet his eyes. The cat’s sandpaper tongue tickles Josh’s cheek as it kisses his tears away. Like his other cat would.

Like Tyler would.

x

They stay there for a while, before Josh decides it’s time to go home. He likes the cat, and the cat seems to enjoy his company too. This time, when he takes the cat home, he decides to call the cat by his name.

“Come on, Tyler. Let’s go home.”

 

_fin_

**Author's Note:**

> probably not the final draft of this fic, so comments and criticism are encouraged.  
> find me at actualtylerrjoseph.tumblr.com if you want to request a fic!  
> also, Josh Dun does not fuck the cat, they're just friends


End file.
